Parents learn ways to help kids respond to Mideast conflict

By DAVID LAZARUS

The Canadian Jewish News, May 23, 2002, 12 Sivan, 5762

MONTREAL - Parents of Jewish students can help their kids "sift through the distortions" Israel faces, but they must also realize the Mideast can't be reduced to simplistic ideas about which side is absolutely right or wrong, Prof. Gil Troy of McGill University told a special gathering for parents recently.

Troy was among several educators and community professionals invited to help parents of Jewish students educate themselves and their children and learn to take action regarding Israel.

Troy, speaking to about 70 parents, delivered an impassioned plea to develop a model for reacting to the current Mideast crisis based on a better understanding of the region's nuances and complexities.

One of the papers handed out by Troy was a compilation of the "delusions, distortions and lies" about such issues as Israel's history, the current situation and terrorism.

One of the first that should be done away with is the idea that "our side is right, their side is wrong," Troy's paper said.

"This is the kind of zero-sum thinking that makes it difficult to make peace," Troy wrote. "The Oslo accords were an attempt at compromise, and part of compromise entails acknowledging complexity and conflicting narratives."

Troy referred to the current situation in Israel as a "clash of civilizations," and as "incomprehensible, frustrating and sad."

It is up to supporters of Israel, he said, to face this highly emotional time with the power that knowledge brings.

The event, organized by the Bronfman Jewish Education Centre (BJEC) and held at the home of Marc and Nancy Gold, included brief workshops on subjects ranging from educating the community to the portrayal of Israel in the media to ways to solidify the home-school-Israel connection.

Karen Gazith, director of BJEC's educational services, told The CJN that the evening grew out of the need to "educate parents in a way to ensure that Israel has a strong place within the family."

Some of the ideas that emerged, she said, were for parents and schools to "network" more together, for Shabbat dinner conversation at home to deliberately focus on Israel, and for parents themselves to organize similar evenings in their own homes.

Another intriguing idea was a program called "Virtual Israel," which is being billed as an opportunity for Montreal Jews to help Israel and Israelis. It will be officially launched May 19.

"The feeling was: ŒWe need to do something. What can we do? " Gazith said, adding that the evening, "left parents with a passionate desire to get involved."

For that reason alone, Gazith characterized the event as an unqualified success.

In addition to Troy's discussion, Israel's vice-consul in Montreal, Nina Ben Ami, presented a visual presentation of the carnage and havoc suicide bombers have wreaked on Israel.

Just 11/2 years ago, Ben Ami said she believed peace was only a matter of time.

But now, in order to deal with the pain, she said, people have almost had to "numb" themselves to the latest report of a suicide bombing.

Israel was "provoked beyond the ability to hold back" prior to its recent incursion into the territories.

With false reports of a massacre in Jenin, Ben Ami said, "I feel like I live in an Orwellian world every day."

Andrea Freedman, director of FEDERATION CJA's Israel and overseas department, said the evening was part of an effort to mobilize elements of the community in a more "systematic way" to the crisis.

Among those taking also taking part were BJEC executive director Shlomo Shimon, Hillel Jewish Student Centre director Simon Bensimon, Canadian Jewish Congress, Quebec region, communications officer Eta Yudin, Bialik High School's Hanna Eliashiv, Maurice Shalom, community relations advisor to the Montreal police department, and FEDERATION CJA executive vice-president Danyael Cantor.